Reflecting back to where and how this all began. It is difficult to pinpoint an exact moment in time, however I do remember the overall feel. The feelings while growing up to where I am today. Key word here is FEEL. It took me a long time to recognize the importance of this word. My life has been full of amazing experiences, and some very challenging. Grateful for the courage, today I can acknowledge these as beautiful lessons. As I share these in my story, my purpose is to enlighten the reader, believing my experiences may resonate and support someone!
Before I get started, a little about who I am. A women who chooses to wear many hats.
I am a wife to a supportive husband, a mom to a teenage boy and an 11 year old “puppy”. I believe life is about experiences! ALL of them! I value freedom..of space, thoughts, expression. For me this means learning and growing, the reason for all the “hats”. This is the core of who I am. Highly empathic, any restrictive feelings are suffocating to me. For the majority of my life there has been a theme, one of “being on the move” / “on the road”. Humble to have explored many countries, experienced cultures, exposed to poverty and riches, my hope is this will assist me in the journey of supporting the diversity of population. May you feel the same!
Ok, off we go.
Peace of Self started with a thought, that our HOME is the core of our wholeness. Recognizing how my ungrounded upbringing and life choices kept me in a place of detachment, this would bring a big piece to my healing. Creating a space where I wanted to be, allowed for the explorations of finding myself. Courage to show up for and to be part of the world….rawness and all!!!
Starting at the age of five, free willed and independent, reaching for my own breakfast cereal, using the bottom cabinets as my steps, climbed up onto the counter, gas burner on, coffee brewing. Mom was in the shower, siblings still sleeping, my nightgown swept into the flames as I reached for my cereal. On fire, mom came to my rescue throwing me out into the snow (January in New England for the win here). Now a girl with scars, it had a big impact on my self confidence and worth. That feeling of not being (pretty) enough rippled inside my being. Here was the start to my life times of transitions.
Growing up in a highly dysfunctional, alcoholic/abusive household, we moved a lot! Oddly enough hospitals became my consistency. I remember being pulled out of schools for doctors appointments and surgeries, constantly changing schools learning became difficult. My parents split in my teenage years, creating the biggest shift as we moved to Norway. Here we would have support from moms family. It was the best and worst experience. The calm came in the house with no violence yet the storm that I kept at bay started to unravel, here I started to finally explore, How was I really feeling?
Age 24, I understood the need to gain fresh insights, perspectives and the courage of finding who “AM I” without preconceived notions of others expectations. On my own I moved back to the USA. Here I would start the journey of picking up the pieces of myself. Ebb and flows of finding my initial grounding, interesting enough, came to me as I entered into the world of aviation. Being a flight attendant in the charter version of aviation created excitement. Unpredictable days, schedules and types of passengers/people I would spend time with was comforting, its familiarity of my upbringing resonated within. Never knowing what would take place next. This served as a great transition, culturally, emotionally & mentally.
Escapism with a hint of detachment from reality at its best.
Meeting my husband, pregnant/birth of our son, 9/11, career change, all this came in the latter part of my 20s to mid 30s. What I knew and associated as being “me” was gone, my 10 year span of being a flight attendant ended. Learning to shift into being a wife and a mother created uncomfortableness. I am only one.. HOW do I shift to these roles without losing what I have found in the search of who AM I?”
Transitions, unveiling, redefining, shifting, new chapters, understandings. All important words. As I write pivotal points in my life, I like to define as chapters, the common thread here is to ask ourselves, HOW do we continue to evolve and maintain ourselves as individuals yet honor others into our environment, bringing our whole selves to society.
Yoga found me in 2014.
Connecting me to my body, I started to listen to what it had to say! Quickly the interest of a yoga retreat weekend! It propelled my inner self discoveries along with introduction to Energy healing work. In my past there had been chapters of my life where “talk therapy” had its purpose, however THIS experience brought the BIGGEST puzzle piece to finding ME. As the old feelings were released, understood and experienced, I could breath. Shedding layers of armor, piece by piece I found peace within.
Peace of Self is exactly this, the journey, the PIECES… Allowing it all to happen! Listening! Trusting your intuition yet confident to allow the shedding of layers. Here we breathe it all in. Piece by Piece we become whole, Peace of Self is not a destination it is about creating the JOURNEY. YOUR own Journey!